If you’re spending Christmas day—or any holiday—alone, it’s understandable to feel like this time of year can really suck. The world around us seems to glow with festive lights, cheerful music, and messages of togetherness, which can make being on your own feel even harder.
I’ve been fortunate to have Bernard, our kids, and grandkids to share the holidays with most years. But I know what it’s like to spend Christmas on my own. Those times were tough. It’s only one day out of the year, but the loneliness can feel overwhelming. For some people, it’s not just a one-off experience but a recurring reality. I’ve had friends, colleagues, and clients tell me directly, “It sucks!”
We’re bombarded with the idea that the holidays are The Most Wonderful Time of the Year. And maybe they are for some—and that’s fantastic. But it’s important to acknowledge that it’s not the case for everyone. If your kids or step-kids are with their other parent, you might feel that pang of emptiness. If you’ve recently lost someone you love or gone through a separation, the holidays can intensify your grief.
Even having a full house doesn’t always guarantee happiness. I’ve had moments where I felt the sting of loneliness despite being surrounded by family. It’s a reminder that our emotional experiences are deeply personal and valid, regardless of our circumstances.
I recently watched A Christmas Winter Song on Lifetime. It’s about Fred, a homeless former jazz singer, and Clio, who’s grieving her father. Together, they rediscover the holiday spirit. It’s a touching story with a happy ending—a comforting escape, sure, but not always reflective of real life. I couldn’t help but think, That’s nice, but…
Sometimes, a feel-good movie isn’t enough to counteract the weight of loneliness during the holidays. For those struggling, the season can feel isolating, even if family and friends are just a call away.
I can’t magically change your circumstances. Holidays can be hard—I get it. But there are things you can do to ease the sadness and bring a spark of joy into your day. It’s all about creating small, intentional moments that feel special to you.
Here are some ideas that might help:
One Christmas, I decided to focus on treating myself kindly rather than lamenting what I didn’t have. I made my favorite meal, wrapped a few small gifts, and spent the day reading a book I’d been saving. It didn’t erase the loneliness, but it transformed the day into something meaningful.
What about you? How do you cope when the holidays feel less than merry? Share your thoughts in the comments—and if you know someone who might be struggling, pass this along. A small gesture can make a big difference.
Let’s help each other find a little light in what can be a tough time of year.
Tags
building relationships, Christmas, connecting, grandchildren, Holidays, loneliness, stepchildren, stepfamily time
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