I recently got married to a great guy who has a 13 year old son and 19 year old daughter. Nothing prepared me for the experience of being an instant stepmom! I constantly felt like an outsider and like I was screwing everything up because I had no clue how to act. The kids couldn’t even look at me, much less acknowledge my existence and my husband had a hard time because he was caught in the middle.
Then I started working with Claudette. She helped me to understand that everything was “normal” and also encouraged me to set tangible goals with action steps that I could actually do.
In just a few short, miraculous months, we have reached family goals that I literally thought would take 3-5 years to materialize. Instead of feeling like an outsider I am now more relaxed and able to be myself, to enjoy being married and part of a family.
Thank you so much, Claudette!
Kim Nishida - Stepmom
"You taught me to focus on things that were important to me and create specific goals to reach them.
You gave me great suggestions for how to deal with parenting and stepmom issues. "
Joyce - Stepmom
During the coaching series, I became more confident in my abilities as a stepmom and my attitude became more positive over the course of our work.
Legal issues get in the way of many of our dreams and goals but you helped me to realize there are still things I can continue to do to keep moving forward.
Some of the strengths that I’ve uncovered in myself were that I’m feel more confident and I have a new way of approaching my goals.
I always assumed a coach would focus more on helping me to meet specific goals they set for me. I was pleasantly surprised at how you helped me to determine my own goals. Those expectations [goals] were met as well as so much more. You also listened to personal issues I was having as a stepmom and gave me great suggestions on how to overcome these obstacles.
You taught me to focus on things that were important to me and create specific goals to reach them. You gave me great suggestions for how to deal with parenting and stepmom issues. You taught me how to attain my goals by giving me small tasks to complete which would lead me in the right direction.
I think you did a super job.
My work with Claudette began in January 2018 and though the timing was unintended, it was a very good way to begin the New Year. Having been with my partner for 7 years and experiencing one difficulty after another with his adult daughters, I was reaching the end of my rope. Through tears of frustration during an online search of “why are my adult stepchildren so difficult?”, I found The Stepmom Coach”, and boy, am I glad I did.
Claudette has worked with me 2-3 times per month, setting goals, discussing the overwhelming ‘common-ness’ of what I have experienced and given me the confirmation that I am not a doormat. She helps me set attainable goals and gives me the support I need to achieve them. My partner is slowly beginning to accept that our problems are not unusual and indeed very common in step family dynamics.
She has given me ‘homework’, books to read and tells me the tough truth. She helps me to accept that some situations just “are”. Is it easy examining oneself and relationships or the role I play in the family dynamic? No, but the work with The Stepmom Coach is worth the effort, helps with acceptance of myself as I am, and the adult stepdaughters as they are, and the recognition that the relationships I have are worth saving or improving.
The help I receive from Claudette is worth every penny – and the improvements, although slow, have piqued my interest enough to see where all my work will lead. The Stepmom Coach is educated, informed, well trained and supportive as well as compassionate. She provides a perspective that I hadn’t considered previously and prods me into figuring out where and what I can improve. I can’t recommend Claudette enough. I always feel better and ‘reset’ after our conversations with direction to follow until our next appointment.
I just wanted to thank you for everything. The last 12 weeks have been a total wake-up call for me. I went from being indecisive to knowing exactly what I wanted. Your kick in the butt every week has been life changing. While you gave me those kick in the butt, there you were almost beside me saying: ” Come on you can do this, I am waiting for you at this end” and at the end of or beginning of the week there you were again with your support, understanding, kindness, suggestions and care to give me the next kick.
Thanks to all of this, here I am with the position I was dreaming of, doing what I love most. Thank you a thousand time for being there for me.
Josy Labbe - Stepmom/Mom
After twenty years, I still wanted to address personal needs and to improve my communication with my two children and my husband. Asking and getting help from a life coach was new for me, but it was a life changing experience.
The benefits exceeded my expectations. They were the subtle realizations about myself that allowed me to be better prepared to reach my goals. I learned that by breaking the process into a smaller steps, I could manage it more easily.
From Claudette L. Chênevert’s suggestions, I was able to go from an overwhelmed individual with insurmountable problems to a self-assured person who has all the resources in her to rise above difficulties.
This was the highlight of my coaching series. From this series, I discovered that giving time and attention to a small part of a whole situation gave me, an impatient person, the time to stay calm and to look at my personal strengths and experiences first, in order to relate with the individual with whom I want to better communicate and have a better understanding of what was going on.
"Your newsletter has helped me understand how difficult step-families can be and also how rewarding they are too. Also, I kept wondering why is this relationship sooooo difficult."
M.D. - Stepmom
I went on the website sometime ago and did a search for info on step-families and I came across your website. I’ve been receiving the newsletter and wanted to say that I really enjoy reading about this topic!
It helps me to understand my situation. I felt so abnormal dealing with my step-family as most of my family and friends are married to their original mate and everything seems so perfect. I think I’ve been the black sheep of the family who got a divorce and then joined another relationship.
Your newsletter has helped me understand how difficult step-families can be and also how rewarding they are too. Also, I kept wondering why is this relationship sooooo difficult.
There’s lots to write about but I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your life’s moments. It helps me relate and realize how hard I have to work and understand. I really love my husband and his kids.
Thank you so much for allowing me to participate in the tele-seminar. I found it very informative and I really feel that it will help me in my relationship with my stepdaughter. I realize that my expectations from our relationship were unrealistic.
Your ‘mentor’ or ‘extra mom’ idea really struck me as something that I could benefit from. The seminar also made me aware that my stepdaughter and I are lacking one on one time, and really getting to know each other as individuals.