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When Fear Gets In The Way Of
You Being Involved In Your Stepkids' Life

Your stepdaughter comes to you, asking for advice about what to wear for her homecoming. You’re thrilled that she even bothered asking you, yet you hold back from saying anything. You’re afraid she’ll rebuff your ideas or snicker at your suggestions.

You avoid taking chances because you’ve been burnt in the past. The last thing you want is to be rejected. It hurts too much.

In your heart, you’ve been waiting for this moment, for the day your stepdaughter comes to you for some advice, trusts you enough to ask your opinion. You wonder if you’re even able to help her, fearing you’ll mess it up. You feel clumsy at this role of stepmothering. Fear is getting in the way of you being involved in your stepkids’ lives.

What if you could turn your fear into an opportunity to do something challenging, to put yourself out there and take a risk. How would that feel? SCARY! I know. It’s scary to allow yourself to become vulnerable to people you’ve not had good experiences with in the past.

You might have tried to get close to your stepkids, but it often ended in a big argument with them telling you “You’re Not My Mom!” After that, all you wanted to do is pack your stuff and leave.

Sometimes, you may need help in finding out what’s the best approach to responses like the one above. A coach can really help you look at what’s normal or typical in similar situations and what you can do when you’re flooded with fear.

Relationships are built by creating and sharing positive moments. This might mean that you’ll need to face those fears of rejection and take a risk. A coach’s job is to help you find the best ways to get the results you’re looking for. This kind of investment makes a difference in how you and your stepkids relate to one another, now and in the future.

When you invest in the relationship, you’re also showing your stepkids they matter enough for you to do what it takes to make this relationship work. You’re showing your stepkids that even when the relationship is strained, you look for ways to make it better, even when you’re not comfortable with the process. When you focus on what you want for you and your stepkids, it becomes easier to take those steps and take a risk.

Don’t let your fears get in the way of getting closer to your stepkids. Never stop learning new ways to connect with one another. Seek to understand their side of their reality. Seek help to guide you in taking the steps needed to bring you closer together.

There will always be setback and sometimes you might have to take alternative measures in order to get closer to your stepkids. Keep your focus on what you’re trying to accomplish. Continue to implement what works and discard what doesn’t. You’ll soon be on your way in succeeding in creating a stronger and healthier relationship for both of you.

Need help in getting facing your fears with rejection with your stepkids? Click HERE to get started.

Why join the Stepmom Resource Library?

  • Expert Guidance: Access to curated resources and tools designed by a certified stepmom coach with years of experience in helping stepmothers navigate their unique challenges.
  • Comprehensive Topics: Dive into a wide range of topics essential for stepmoms, including managing stress, setting boundaries, improving communication, dealing with conflict, fostering a positive relationship with stepchildren, and more.
  • Practical Strategies: Gain practical tips and strategies that you can implement immediately in your stepfamily dynamics, helping you build a more cohesive and harmonious family environment.
  • Supportive Community: Connect with like-minded stepmothers facing similar challenges, providing a supportive space to share experiences, seek advice, and offer encouragement.
  • Exclusive Content: Enjoy access to exclusive content not available elsewhere, including worksheets, checklists, templates, and insightful articles tailored specifically for stepmoms.
  • Flexible Learning: Learn at your own pace and convenience, with 24/7 access to the library from any device, allowing you to fit learning into your busy schedule.
  • Empowerment and Growth: Empower yourself with the knowledge and tools needed to thrive in your stepmom role, fostering personal growth and enhancing your overall well-being.
  • Free Membership: Joining the Stepmom Resource Library is completely free, making it accessible to all stepmothers seeking support and guidance on their stepfamily journey. 

By joining the Stepmom Resource Library, you're not just gaining access to a wealth of valuable resources; you're also becoming part of a supportive community dedicated to helping you navigate the complexities of stepfamily life with confidence and grace.

Don't miss out on this opportunity to empower yourself and transform your stepfamily experience!

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Tags

building relationships, connecting, fear, relationship, stepkids, stepmom

About the Author

CLAUDETTE CHENEVERT, aka The Stepmom Coach, works with women as they struggle to create a cohesive family life. As a speaker, author and stepfamily professional, Claudette mentors and guides stepmothers through the process of establishing a harmonious and thriving home life for their families. Her newest title, “The Stepmom’s Book of Boundaries,” is now available on Amazon.com and elsewhere. Learn about her coaching practice and self-study program for stepmoms at StepmomCoach.com.

Claudette Chenevert

The original content you just enjoyed is copyright protected by The Stepmom Coach—aka Claudette Chenevert—who proudly offers information, tips, products and other resources for building better relationships “one STEP at a time” via 1:1 coaching, self-guided coursework and more. Suitability is to be determined by individual users based on their own concerns and circumstances, as The Stepmom Coach does not endorse and is not liable for opinions expressed by third parties (i.e., advertisers, affiliates, audience members, clients).


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